Published by: Ingrid King. Last Updated on: February 2, 2023 by Crystal Uys
Have you ever had to make a really big decision and found yourself paralyzed by fear? Maybe you were trying to decide whether to leave your job. Maybe a relationship had gone sour and you were thinking about leaving. Maybe you were trying to decide about moving to a new city. But you found yourself unable to make a decision. Why do we get stuck when it comes to making big decisions, and how can we overcome this?
One of the main reasons why we often find it hard to make decisions is that we think of the outcome being right or wrong. Contrary to the funny picture at the top of this post, there really are no wrong decisions (although the kitten in the photo might disagree!), there are only different choices. Once you truly believe that, it becomes easier to make decisions. Additionally, very few decisions are irreversible. We always have the power to make a different choice.
Another reason why making a decision can be difficult is fear. Fear of the outcome, fear of how a “wrong” decision may impact our lives and the lives of those around us, fear of taking some risks. A fear-based decision is never a good decision. Fear limits. If we live in fear, we will never be able to realize our full potential. Fear is never truth. If you feel fear, remember to connect with your spiritual core and remind yourself that there is no room for fear when you are connected to your true self.
So how do we go about making decisions without getting caught up in worry, fear and limitations? One of the best pieces of advice I got from one of my mentors was to make decisions from the place I want to be, not from the place I’m in. This means that if I’m thinking and dreaming big, I need to be ready to make decisions that support that kind of thinking. I can’t decide from a place of fear and scarcity if I want to live a big life that fully reflects who I really am.
Amber doesn’t understand why humans have such a difficult time making decisions. She says all decisions are ultimately only about two things: does it feel good? Or does it feel bad? Make the decision that feels good, and it will always serve you.
About the author
Ingrid King is an award-winning author, former veterinary hospital manager, and veterinary journalist who is passionate about cats.
Thanks for your comment, Shannon. Isn’t it amazing how life changes once we figure out that fear only serves to keep us stuck?
Great post, Ingrid! Living in fear will only keep us stuck and most likely the things we DON’T want to happen will keep happening until we remove the fear.
I agree, Tammy, that it can be a challenge to make decisions based simply on what feels good, but once you realize that it’s the only way to go, it gets easier. Congrats on your big decision to move to Oregon – sounds like it’s working out for you!
Confucius Cat, as always, the kitties get it before the humans do. Your mummy is lucky to have you.
Good advice. I always try to do things that make me and my mummy happy.
I like Amber’s advice at the end. I’m learning to live that way actually! (though it’s not always as easy as it is for kitties!)
Fear is a paralyzer. My husband and I recently moved to Oregon. Making that decision took a lot of time for us to work around to! Once the decision had been made though, we knew it was right because everything started falling into place. Now that we’re here, I can’t help but wonder, why didn’t we do this sooner?! 🙂 And we know, if we wind up not wanting to live here long-term, we only have to decide where to go next!
Great post!